Cyber Bullying

Cyber bullying has become rampant, and at a certain point you need to stand up to it. I was asked to pay a ransom to remove my name in a blog publishing falsified news and fake content. I have approached #Google, #Bing #Wordpress for the last 20 years flagging the falsified content, and #cybercell division of police online but none took it seriously.

To summarize this is how it all began, I used to attend youth charismatic retreats and did so annually at Divine Retreat Center as a teen. I was asked if I can look into some technical issues regarding the primary Divine Retreat website managed by late Suraj Thomas. I volunteered to help and during the week I was there, we decided to move all Divine sites under single hosting provider for better management.
Divine’s gospel group Abey and Swapna had a site jesusandyou.com which was registered by a “friend” VP, cleverly in his name. When I requested him to hand over the site, he sent me a letter written in English filled with abusive Malayalam words (native language of the state where I stay). As we discovered, he was using the website to earn on affiliate ads and he didn’t want to lose this source of income as Abey and Swapna’s songs used to attract lots of traffic. He cut off everyone from the website and took full control, started selling Abey & Swapna’s albums and didn’t allow even prayer requests to be forwarded from the site. He didn’t stop with these…

I, being a volunteer and not a paid staff, returned home after a week.
After a week at the Divine center I returned home and thought this entire issue is over for me… But it was only the beginning of decades of INTERNET HARRASMENT! I started receiving abusive letters and sms from him almost every week. He started publishing ridiculous lies about me in each and every blog he could gain access to accusing me of being a hacker. Somehow, he came to know that I’m from an affluent family and started demanding $20,000 ransom as “settlement” from me to remove my name from his sites. I refused… At that point I though I could easily have it removed by complaining to Google, Bing or WP as it was just a bunch of made up nonsense, as long as we don’t have harsher punitive fines like those in the US this is bound to continue…

Several times I approached Google, Bing, Word Press and other platforms where he was publishing his posts, even Cyber Crimes division of police to remove the search content which painted everyone at Divine and myself in a bad light. No one paid attention… Almost 20 years passed. Content is still online. A few months back I once again approached a person who owns one of the blogs these posts were published on about 3 years ago. He replied “it will cost me money to have it removed”… As I did not reply the dates keep updating to current year to make it look like it is a recent event.

Did it affect me?

Yes, grievously many times… We live in a digital era when background verification starts and ends on the net. Having a LUNATIC work against you online can end your carrier in a blink of an eye! In India with our population, nobody cares to dig up the truth! On the other hand I had to upskill like crazy learn a zillion new systems, but I was like gold refined in a furnace, I became better at my work, with each job adding a new skillset, offering better salaries and position and having to stay on my toes at all times.

Now the question is should we give in to cyber bullying?

I would never pay a pervert one dime as it would be against my principles. If I give in and pay this will mean that whatever he wrote about me is true and I have to shell out my cash to cover up my “sins”…

We overcome it by just living our normal lives, and people who know us may not even give it a second thought. The key is to never give in, and never go offline, be very present in you posts and communities minding your business, be engaged in your daily online routines and add more visibility on what you do, at some point the bulley will feel hollow and ashamed of his actions. What does not kill you makes you stronger, and in the end belive it, Truth alone Triumphs.

Cyber bullying doesn’t end at Hight School… Digital environment has became a convenient space for all sorts of lunatics and thieves to thrive on our weaknesses… Under the veil of anonymity anybody can write anything they please about you, can manipulate your images and post them online to harass you, can use Internet to abuse, threaten and extort cash from you… And there’s nobody to stop them. Because platforms who provide them with this privilege are not concerned about “safety” of their digital space…

What if I paid my way out?

The person who started these conspiracy sites and even caused police raids on a catholic institution after two decades of false propaganda quit on his conspiracy sites after Gods hand, only to have this new guy, who copied the old site and is at the same game, maybe its the same person masqurading as someone else. Extortionist thrive on paying customers, and some psychopaths never quit, so once you do submit or pay, it will never end, its easy money and you are now an easy target!

What will others think?

This is the main reason for many teenagers commiting sucides today and thats why I think stating this is important. I can assure you, if its people who are close to you, they know you and not some rubbish written on some site, if they do, just give it time. My beautiful Russian wife, another Gods gift, came across all this before we married and she confronted me, and still chose me as life partner. She changed my life, my thinking and perspective of life, so as a whole my suggestion is pay no thought to it, bolt it out!

First stop how you think, don’t get paranoid, no one is talking behind your back or laughing at you. When you encounter these sort of issues at young age, you think everyone knows, and the truth is nobody cares! So live your life carefree, your life and what you accomplish is far more precious! Change your location if you must, and start afresh.

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Happy Anniversary My Dearest !

Not by Words, But by Actions

We need to strive to build a society that values skill rather than lip service, sense respect from subordinates by those meeting requirements in time, and value people by those who take the extra effort to deliver, however insurmountable the odds.  We need to be able to appreciate those who work for us and not reflect bad attitude of some superiors down the line. No two people are alike and people with excellent skills very seldom provide lip service to their superiors to boost their egos.  This is the primary reason for superiors to begin treating some of their subordinates with contempt, they quickly forget the years of toil and labor and dedication put in by their trustworthy ally as they are taken up by their own egocentric views.  Those with good skills have a common desire to live with dignity not because they undervalue authority of superiors rather unconsciously demand the same respect reciprocated to them for their good works.  We need to identify pressure channels and direct them away from the workforce, most middle level executives act like connectors and which channel flow of emotions from seniors with the same tenancy to the working team which kills productivity and happiness in work environment.  Technical managers should strive not to compete with subordinates, nor try to make a show of their skill when not called for, as it often tends to demotivate people rather than encourage them.  We need to be patient listeners willing to learn from subordinates, and allow them to voice their opinions, and encouraging them to perform what they do best rather than imposing our personal ideas and theories that may be outdated in a modern context.  Avoid social manipulation in workplace, this beings with discriminating someones repute by hurling misleading impressions that you may have about them among peer groups and social gatherings which is both cynical and criminal in nature.  People working in senior levels can quickly undermining a persons good till he leaves a company as they may not have satisfied their personal over-inflated egos.  Value every member of your team, there are people with various skill levels, our job is to find a place for each one of them, if a person is hardworking, then they deserves a chance, no matter how well they can do the task or how much time they require, they will surely improve over time, and look up to you as the person who made a difference in their life. Even if we may not have time to help a single soul in our daily work and busy lives, we can still do much more good by not collaborating against others in our workplace to make their lives more difficult due to our own personal egos, jealousy or purse hatred in any form and act on it and stop others from doing it.

Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation; and a house divided against a house falleth.
Luke 11:17

Let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.
1 John 3:18

Material, Spiritual and Humane Values

Hoarding of possessions is a devastating personal habit, it is a testament of greed, and sure sign of material attachment.  Some material possessions are essential for happy living, to serve our daily needs, ease our toil and burdens.  Some possessions bring us comfort while others boost moral and self esteem.  If we attach our personal value and worth to what we hold in our possession  then we are at a loss, as the more importance that we place on possessions, the lesser we care about people.  We become obsessed with preserving the few possessions which have collected over time, spending limited time, money and wealth, while being unable to let go from the grievous hold it has upon us and in our lives.  The nearer we are to known people, family members and familiar groups, the greater is the thirst to build up this false image of what we assume is our superficial value or how we are measured, which may be true to some extent as we are mostly surrounded by materialistic people with little or no value for humane relations.  This eventually leads only to further segregation and resentment from those who are truly important and close to us.  We become a servant of our possessions, saving it and guarding it for none but ourselves.  It is not driven by some innate desire to bestow it to our siblings or children, but being unable to accept the fact that even they do not need it, ask for it, or want it as there are far better things the world in every place, and in every age.  Our material desire surpasses our spiritual desire or even human desire to be with family.  The key is in having faith that the things which are impossible with men are possible with God, for only he can save them from this deadly grip.

The Rich Ruler Comes to Jesus
20You know the commandments, Do not commit adultery, Do not kill, Do not steal, Do not bear false witness, Honor your father and your mother.
21And he said, All these have I kept from my youth up.
22Now when Jesus heard these things, he said unto him, Yet you lack one thing: sell all that you have, and distribute unto the poor, and you shall have treasure in heaven: and come, follow me.
23And when he heard this, he was very sorrowful: for he was very rich.
24And when Jesus saw that he was very sorrowful, he said, How hard it is for those that have riches to enter into the kingdom of God!
25For it is easier for a camel to go through a needle’s eye, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.
26And they that heard it said, Who then can be saved?
27And he said, The things which are impossible with men are possible with God.

Luke 18: 20-27

Eyes of Love

Communion is the willingness to spend time together, it is a yearning to dwell in each others presence.  It can be physical or meta physical in nature, for no other reason than the strong desire to be near our beloved companion.  The intimacy experienced can be intensely gratifying which leaves us longing for more.  God made us in his likeness, and therefore our greatest strength dwells in our capacity to love and be loved.  In our quite moments in prayer there are great many mysteries revealed, it is having the intense love and desire to know more about our maker that yields response. Love is the key that opens the door heavenwards.  Your first desire is to know more about the one you love, it is only natural that we want to know more and more about our beloved.  It is when we ask in love that many hidden secrets are revealed. I believed that God may be a heavenly being, as Solomon expressed that heavens could not contain him and the earth but a footstool, hence how could he imagine that the Lord could have been contained within the confines of the temple which he built, I strongly feel that was a revelation moment for him.  A revelation moment is an instant of deep insight which unravels your mind and senses which often may require days to fully understand or interpret.  God is not some being hidden somewhere in space, he is space, he is everywhere, in everything. We are the individual planets that make up his body, the individual cells wrapped in his love.  Every one that loves him is a star which lights up his world.  We are no different, as we have the same galaxy contained within us, as we are made in his likeness, we have an unlimited capacity to love without bounds, to add each person to our heart and to love him and care for his people.  The more people we look upon with eyes of love we bring a warmth to their heart, and when it is reciprocated they become the stars is our galaxy and greater is our happiness contained within us.

The light of the body is the eye: therefore when thine eye is single, thy whole body also is full of light; but when thine eye is evil, thy body also is full of darkness. Take heed therefore that the light which is in thee be not darkness. If thy whole body therefore be full of light, having no part dark, the whole shall be full of light, as when the bright shining of a candle doth give thee light.

Luke 11:34-36

The Invisible Benefactor

Success is the end result of the planning and dedication of people who work together as a team for a common cause.  Each person believes in his heart that it is their personal contribution that led to the successful outcome of any project. The individual worker believes it is their ingenuity and hard labor that led to the success, the managers feel that it is their coordinated efforts, the architects believe it is their superior technical design, the sales team believes that it is their marketing skills that sealed the deal, and the CXOs feel that it is their planning, meetings, network, qualifications & reputation that led to the outcome.  Everyone believes that he/she is important and an achiever in his/her own right.  This notion is greatly multiplied over the years to build self confidence in being able to consistently achieve and deliver the impossible.  The negative outcome is the build up of arrogance which tends to look down on the effort of others in an ordinary light.  When you fly solo you realize that things don’t come that easy, now there is more scrutiny in each step of the way, the projects that were handed down with a presentation over a cup of coffee has now many levels of scrutiny from the years in business to domain expertise,  from employee base to company turnover, from personal qualifications to company certifications.  That is the moment you realize the invisible hand that was supporting you all the way, it becomes even more evident when every simple activity suddenly becomes a daunting task and your manual intervention is constantly required to keep things afloat.  Very few people realize the simple fact that people need people to succeed.  We need to put all differences aside and respect each others talents and honor them, for what you respect you attract.  We are nothing without our invisible team and our God, who keeps us afloat and leads us on every day to new and exciting challenges as we move ahead from faith to faith.

Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the Word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things which do appear.

Hebrews 13:1

Standing Tall

Excellence in skill leads to enterprunership. It is having the faith to pursue a goal fueled by the capacity and knowledge to build and drive an enterprise. Though most often enterprenreship can be a quick road to a defeated spirit. It is a condition that is unwiling to be enslaved but still commits to the regular toil and bondage without complaints. Some build on favour while others build on skill, favor often begets more than skill. The defeated spirt seldom has the will to lay down its pride before others; to bribe or to beg, but living in absolute faith of their God given abilities and rather showcase their skills by their work. An equitable working condition is where the individuals can work without being subject to anyone and live and work in an free enviroment helping each other to achieve their goals by applying their unique talents. It is where their skills are valued, appriciated and rewarded. It becomes an enviroment of both encouragement and healing. We are but victims of circumstance, and most often, the most incapable souls wrongfully judge the best of us. We can find solace only when we find unity. Life’s greatest pursuit is finding unity, one in our life partner, next in our spirtual lives and in finding the right environment, both to live and work. There are no boundaries tha keep us than the ones we create, there are no barriers than the ones we accept, it should be our continous effort to attain that which we seek relentlessly till we meet our goal or our beloved maker.

For the Lord is our judge, the Lord is our lawgiver, the Lord is our king; he will save us.
Isaiah 33:22

Excellence @ Work

The world differs significantly from the rosy picture that was showcased in schooling and upbringing. We are taught that we should always strive to do our best, and that great work will be greatly blessed, abundantly praised and richly rewarded. In the real world most often good work goes unnoticed or considered as what is expected as a standard, great work often leads to conflict with your peers, and exemplary work leads to segregation and misinterpretation of intentions. A job well done encourages your spirit and soul, and often the benefactors of end result are not immediately visible and hopefully the experience adds value to your skill set. Excellence in work will most often challenge your superiors since it makes them look less remarkable or at worst ignorant which further invigorates tensions. Promotions are mostly awarded to people who pose no significant threat to superiors and whose existence may relay on regular lip service, quite servitude or on constant support of their peers.  Those who challenge and suggest innovative ideas and think of new dimensions walk a thin line of having the benefit of keeping their jobs if they succeed or bear the wrath of failure at many levels if their best efforts should fail.  Your failure to improve your job prospects is an evidence of your failure to cope with the ever changing requirements of the industry. A long service award is a paltry show, and a sure sign of getting too comfortable in a heating caldron. There is no one who owes you for your long service, and there is no concept of loyalty or belonging in the modern age and your job security and is as good as the insurance plan chosen by the company for you. Job hopping is a sign that you are well qualified to rise above the crowd and deliver tangible results and a quicker way to immediate promotions with doubling salaries in shorter periods of time. No matter how the organization views your effort it always pays to do your very best in the end, as there is always someone greater who will appreciate and lift you into higher ground even if may not happen in the same departments, company or workplace. Always hone your skills and talents as they define who you are and what you become.

And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ. But he that doeth wrong shall receive for the wrong which he hath done: and there is no respect of persons.

Colossians 3:23-25

Tactical Improvisation

Emotional outbursts have far greater repercussions than tactical improvisation.  Being tactical requires the tempering of the mind to withstand pressure and the tolerance of a saint.  Emotional people are real; they speak their mind, and once said, move on.  Having said that, it depends on the listener’s maturity to take it in the right sense or reciprocate in similar manner.  A tactical person will have the patience to know the time, and the delivery model, if you will, to put across his viewpoints without raising others concerns or sentiments.  Avoid the class of people who are overtly egotistic and highly temperamental and cannot be reasoned with as their pride blinds their assessment of their own capabilities, and their conduct will deteriorate with their morals over time.  Always serve others with all your talents and capabilities but avoid the class of people who would consider your service as common and invaluable and consider your services to them as a right, rather than a sincere free will offering. Service is more important than glory, all glory belongs to God.  Strive to work for and work with good and godly people and befriend the right class of people in life, and their companionship will be a long and rewarding experience.

Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go:  Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul.

Proverbs 22:24-25

A New Beginning

Every end signifies a new beginning, and with the end of a year, we have hope, with Christmas, a new beginning.  Even though Christmas it is of little significance to many unbelievers, we find that everyone, every nation, no matter believer or atheist alike try to make a fresh start, and they all make resolutions and amends for a better year, to live better lives, and this is the profound spiritual impact that Jesus has on the world.  Some may consider it co-incidence, others chance, but there are great many associations that signifies a deep and profound impact Jesus made to the world.  Jesus was born to us 2045 years ago, and his birth parts our timeline to define the ages, BC and AD.  Between BC and AD are 33 years when God walked with us in the flesh.  People who awaited his arrival searched palaces to find him, but he chose to be born in a humble manger and he choose to be born to poor but pure and holy parents.  We see later in his life, and in his ministry that even being God he was not spared from sarcasm, ridicule, insults, torture or for that matter unlawful death, at a time when there was an established law and order under one of the most prominent civilizations of all time, the Roman Empire.   We see that though he was a man of God, and did wonders, there was spiritual jealousy among his colleges, the apostles, and hatred from his superiors, the pharisees.  Jesus was able to perform miracles, far greater than any prophet before him, but only a few accepted him, and those who should have lifted him higher in fact worked against him and plotted to kill him.  Jesus washed the feet of his disciples so that they may know that the gift he gave to them, to heal, to cure and to bless was not to pull rank or authority over others, or establish a closed cult, as we see that the disciples were enraged to find others being able to perform the same miracles in his name, and wanted them to be stopped.  Jesus clearly tells them that whosoever is not against us is with us which is a clear message to all churches.  His objective was to be an instrument of peace, humility and charity and he wanted to lead them by example and so he washed and kissed the feet of his disciples to show his humility and love.  By his birth and  life, he was pure and just, he led the life of purity and faith, he taught others to be like-minded and so we are reminded of our love to God and service to others that we may be called children of God.  Let us in the true spirit of Christmas bless and share what we have with others, and lead by example that others may see and experience Jesus through us.

If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels and mercies, Fulfill ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. Let nothing be done through strife or vain glory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.  Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.  Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus:    Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God:  But made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men:  And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross

Philippians 2:1-8